How to use Breath to eliminate Mental Stress

Stress is a mental condition, wherein one is conditioned to overthink about problems, life challenges, old negative memories, past mistakes or the apprehensions about the future.

Stress can turn into anxiety, which can, in turn, get out of hand and create severe mental health issues in someone’s life. There are millions of people, just in the United States, who are prescribed anti-anxiety and antidepressants, which really means, we are not living with mental sanity or we have no specific method to take care of our mental and emotional health.

There are many tools and methods which can help us create a lifestyle free of stress, conflicts, and emotional turbulence. In today’s world, we can access the information related to simple and effective methods, such as exercising, jogging, journaling, social engagement, timeline schedules, and disciplined sleeping habits. These are some of the factors we all take into account and have heard about them over and over again.

So far, we have also heard about ‘deeper breathing’, as a practice to curb unwanted tension and stress in our body. It has been recommended by the psychologists and many other mental health care practitioners to follow on the regular basis. Though deeper breathing is effective, it’s not the complete science in itself.

There is a higher level science and technology which allows us to use the full potential of breath to cultivate the relaxation in our nervous system, thereby activating, parasympathetic nervous system. This practice is called PRANAYAMA.

As the word suggests, pranayama is made up of two words, Prana and Yama. In Hatha Yoga Pradipika, Pranayama is clarified as “pranic capacity or length”, which is not merely the breath control but the technique through which prana in the body is activated at a higher frequency.

Through the practice of pranayama, various systems in our body are affected and start to perform at it’s best abilities. Below are the body systems which immediately start to get an impact as we begin to practice pranayama breathing.

1. Nervous System
2. Endocrine System
3. Digestive System
4. Cardiovascular System
5. Respiratory System

When we talk about the accumulation of stress in our life, it’s a two-way sword. If you are stressed, then automatically all these above-mentioned systems will get a setback and they tend to deviate from their normal course. Alternatively, if any of these systems are disturbed and are not working in an optimal manner, then you might encounter mental stress as well.

By cultivating yoga and pranayama breathing, we consciously use the breath to alter our physical and mental systems. Breathing deeper and slower, allows our body to get fully oxygenated and exhaling fully helps in the elimination of carbon dioxide and toxins in the body.

  • Prana (the vital life force) and breath are interconnected. If the mind or prana becomes unstable then breath also becomes shallow and faster and if the mind is stable, then breath also becomes longer, slower and harmonious. It’s true vice versa as well. So, in pranayama technique, we use the breath to stabilize the mind by adopting various breath modifications and work on calming down the agitated and restless mind.
  • Using the pranayama techniques, the nervous system impulses become steady and rhythmic, the brain functions get regulated and rhythmic as well.
  • Our breathing process is directly linked to the central nervous system and also with the emotional center of the brain, called hypothalamus. Hypothalamus is responsible for checking the validity of the emotional trigger and control the emotional response. If the breathing is erratic, it sends out the erratic signals to the hypothalamus and thus creates distorted responses which further make the brain function erratic. So, breathing plays a huge role in creating harmony in the body systems, thereby inducing relaxation, calmness and further positive hormone secretion.

Once, we put awareness on our breath and using the technology of pranayama and we are able to hold or restrain the breath even for a few seconds, we somehow reduce the firing of nervous impulses in different parts of the body and harmonize the brain wave pattern.

Mental agitation can be curtailed by increasing the gap between nerve impulses and their responses in the brain. The more we are able to retain the breath, the more the gap gets increased between the nerve impulses.

Thus, breath is the prime anchor to get access to the mind’s stability and harmony. With the practice of techniques such as Ujjayi Pranayama, Nadi Shodhna, and Brahmari, you can easily activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which is also called, rest and digest. It counters the sympathetic nervous system which basically makes the mind hyperactive towards emotional responses.

Controlled inhalation and exhalation combined with retention is the key to bring the awareness inward and disconnect from the pattern of overthinking, mental agitation, anxiousness, and restlessness. The more one practice pranayama, the more benefit he gets in terms of building a stronger body and mind along with significant improvement in the digestive system, respiratory system and overall immunity of the body.

How to know your Life Values?

Self Awareness –  Get to Know Your Values

Values are an incredibly important part of our human existence. Self Awareness is all about getting to know your deeper self which involves knowing your values, principles, triggers, passions, desires, needs, flaws and purpose. People tend to learn and become aware of themselves as they grow up, do things, meet people, build relationships, break relationships, build more, create businesses, deal with bosses or fight with strangers on the road.

You are going to get to know yourself more and more every passing day if you pay attention to your thoughts, emotions, and actions.

Being Self Aware does two things.

1. It makes you realize your thoughts, behaviors, actions, patterns, and personality at large.

2. It helps you become more aware of your emotional triggers which leads you to take hasty decisions and thus, helps you protect yourself from unwanted negative feelings.

Self Awareness will lead you to ‘self-knowledge’ which gives you the power to get to look into your heart and make you see what you truly want to achieve in your life. It allows you to look at your flaws, insecurities and hidden fears which actually is the first step to understand the root cause of any problem. Currently, if you are experiencing any turbulent situation where you feel disconnected with yourself or feel stuck in a negative mindset or are unable to solve a relationship problem, do know that being self-aware is the first thing you need to focus on.

Now, let’s talk about the components of a human life which are important to understand and become Self Aware.

1. Values
2. Beliefs
3. Thoughts
4. Actions

Today, we will cover the values in this particular blog.

Values :

Your values define your core thinking process and the meaning you give to the things in your life. Values can also be linked to the principles one follows in his life. Our core values express our true nature and align us towards things and activities in life. Values play an extremely important role when we are trying to figure out the purpose of our life.

Some of the values that successful and happier people exhibit are honesty, integrity, kindness, generosity, and tolerance. Values may vary in degree in each person and each value can come out explicitly in one situation whereas other remains inactive. We increase the integration of each value in our life by being more aware of it and practicing it consciously. For eg., if you are looking to become more compassionate, you might want to take steps to build that by visiting old home care center once a week or giving out meals to homeless people or volunteering for organizations working for human welfare. Once you start to act towards a certain value, it gets a deeper place in your heart and life.

 

 

Here is what you need to know about the values

1. Values are interlinked

If you are an ‘honest’ person, then you will also have ‘trust’ as your important value which when get compromised would certainly make you feel off and disengaged with the person or the situation where it has occurred. Similarly, if you are a creative person and your prime value is creativity then you will automatically build up other supporting values like open-mindedness or patience. So values are interlinked with other supporting values and it builds up the person’s core personality, character and behavior patterns.

2. Compromising your values causes mental and emotional conflict

It’s the one hell of a truth. Once, when I was 20 years old back in India, I happen to get some extra money in a transaction at a medical store. I kept the extra money with me and felt excited to spend that on food or fun activities in the university. But, after an hour or so, I started to feel very restless and guilty. Why was that so? Why the thrill of spending money on junk food and clothes was transformed into fear and disgust? Simply because our subconscious mind has the information stored about our core feelings, principles we believe in and our thinking process and It will signal the brain to produce weird physical sensations if we are doing something which is in conflict with the truth.

3. Values are a deal maker or breaker – both in personal and professional Life

Value is a person’s principles or standards of behavior and understanding of one’s judgment of what is important in life. When our values are matched with another person, it is very easy to develop the relationship especially in partnerships and marriage which are relatively long-term commitments. Many people get into relationships and don’t connect at a deeper level and wonder why. Many partnerships break down in the very first year of starting out leaving people more frustrated and challenged. The reason for this is because people are not used to looking at other person’s deeper values before committing themselves to bigger things.

Since values are the triggers of a person’s behavior, it’s imperative for us to put emphasis on it and get to understand the person’s core alignments before jumping into a marriage, intimate relationships or business associations. In the past, I myself had been stuck in business partnerships where I felt my one of the core values i.e. freedom, was being compromised. I need the freedom to operate but my partner was always trying to dictate his style of working over me which became suffocating for me and I ended the business deal between us. In your life, if there is any such situation where you feel disconnected from people around, values may be one of the major reasons. Think about it. It might help you reassess your decisions and help you align with your own goals and visions.

So, you can use the values to make important decisions in your life such as :

1. Do I want to be in this relationship? Am I happy about it?
2. Is this job resonating with my top 5 values?
3. Should I start my new business and leave my full-time job?
4. Am I happy and satisfied or I need to figure out something else to get there?

Another thing as we learned about values is that they keep on changing as we grow in our life and shift from my perspective to another. It is suggested to revisit your values a few times in a couple of years to really stay aligned with your own self. The more you operate close to your values, the better you perform and the happier you feel.

 

 

How to identify the core values?

Identifying and understanding your values is a challenging exercise. By becoming more aware of these important factors in your life, you can use them as a guide to make the best choice in any given situation. Your personal values are a central part of who you are and who you want to become.

  • Identify the times when you felt joyful and excited

Think about that moment in your head and write down the reasons you felt that way. Was that any activity that made you so full of life and excited? Who were the people you were interacting with if you were? What type of activity, moment or situation was that about? Would like to repeat that again?

  • Identify the situation when you felt connected and fully engaged

Go to the flashback and repeat that moment in your head. What was so special about that moment? What were your doing? What made you so engaged and absorbed in that activity? What type of connections you created and with whom? How would you describe your feelings? Write this all down on a piece of paper.

  • Identify the time when you felt aligned with life and fully satisfied

Again, repeat the specific moment and think about it deeply. Feel it in your bones. What was so special about that, which made you feel so contented? What other emotions you were experiencing at that time? Who was around you and what type of conversations were you engaged in? What type of activity led you to this experiencing of contentment?

Now, when you have written all this information, you go through your answers one by one and connect them with the values they represent. For example, if playing with your kids made you excited and joyful, then, ‘family’ is in your top five value list.

Another example is, if you felt fully aligned and satisfied while mentoring your subordinates or your clients on a topic of interest, then you certainly have ‘contribution’ as your top value. By doing this exercise, you will build a list of values that you hold currently. You can go further and find your top five core values by comparing each of them based on how often you want to feel in a certain way or how often do you use a certain value more than the other in your experience.

Key Point – When you consider your values in decision making, you can be sure of your natural alignments and sense of integrity and make decisions with more confidence and clarity. You’ll also know that what you’re doing is best for your current and future happiness and satisfaction. Making value-based choices may be getting a lot of resistance in the beginning, however, making a choice that you know is appropriate is a lot less difficult in the long run.

Now, it’s your turn. Comment below and let me know about your top 5 values. Do you recognize them? Which method would you use to identify your top values?

How to set up Routines to Live Stress Free?

We all get stressed and overwhelmed with a long to do list and keeping up with the professional deadlines and personal life goals. Most of the times, people never really finish their to-do list which stresses them out even more as our brain produces cortisol (Stress Hormone) when it acknowledges that something we tried hard has not been accomplished.

Stress is very cyclic in nature and also if you really don’t pay attention, it keeps on lingering in your subconscious brain. We all know the results of accumulated stress which is equally mentally and physically harmful.

I’ve had dealt with Anxiety Disorder for few years in the past which was totally the result of the accumulation of stress. Without elaborating on that, I can tell you that it was the most devastating, unproductive and emotionally challenged time of my life. Along with many other methods of stress removal, building up routine in my life was very powerful to recover from anxiety issues.

The process of dividing the time based on your priorities and number of tasks and sticking to the plan and time table is called routine management. It helps anyone to be more stress-free, mentally relaxed, highly productive as well as aids in the creation of balance in personal and professional life.
Now, how can you build up stronger routine that you would like to stick on without being too much pushy and miserable?

Few tips I have laid down below that can help you build your routine structure for your day.

 

1. Do what works for you and not what any Guru says

So, here is the deal. You can only stick to the plan when you know it’s your way. We hear most people talk about getting up at 5 am and scheduling time for meditation, jogging or running, going to the gym and having finished major blog writing or for that matter an important task by 9 am. They swear by this plan as it works for them.
Though usually, it’s good to get up at early hours of mornings it’s not hundred percent necessary for high productivity, success, and the stress-free mind. I personally can’t ever exercise at 6 am in the morning since I have better physical energy in the evenings. So, I choose to do work out in the evenings and stick to doing my basic meditation at 7 am followed by my official work.

The idea is to figure out how your body and mind can be trained swiftly so you feel the least resistance towards sticking to the routines. If your body resists physical endurance in the morning, make evening routines. Figure out the best time you can be most productive for your professional work outcomes and then choose to spend those hours focusing only on that part.

When you start to pay attention to your energies, alignment, feelings, and emotions while performing day to day activities, you will start to notice what time brings the best result for what kind of tasks. So, when you prepare your To-Do lists, assign the tasks based on your choice and comfort to do them. You will see that you will start to finish your to-do lists efficiently as well have more time available for personal growth and leisure.

 

2. Make people value your Routines & Lifestyle

Yup, I get it. It’s not that easy but it’s doable. If you want a life where you are not always dragging yourself and taking the pressure of the whole world who are trying to get you on their pace and lifestyle, then you need to put a strong foot forward. Honestly, even if you are doing a job as the 9-5 employee or running your own business or even if you are a travel blogger, you still need a solid routine set up in order for you to stay on track with your professional and personal aspirations.

Let’s say, If you don’t say NO to late night parties (excluding few times in a week) as you like to sleep by 11 pm and get up at 6 am, then you will never be able to get stuff done the way you planned and be additionally stressed about that. Sometimes, we feel that people will take us as an arrogant slob or boring and we give in to their lifestyle choices and lose our focus and determination. Fear of being judged wrong way can screw your routine planning.

Additionally, It will always add more anxiousness and stress in life since you are only the happiest version of yourself when you see your growth- either in personal or professional. Without that, you will always feel lost, less confident or stressed.
So, let people judge. For you, the most important person is YOURSELF. Be favorable to yourself. And anyway, when they will see you succeed in your life goals, they will end up respecting you more.

 

 3. Build a camaraderie of Like Minded ‘Routine Sharing Individuals’

Having like minded individuals with whom you share common interests, goals and visions is always a boost to stick to plan or routine. Like, I had a neighbor who loved going for a walk or biking in the woods in the mornings and after knowing that I was even more excited to continue my morning walk routines since I had a like minded companion now with whom I could setup my goals and advance my training.
You can find many like-minded individuals or groups on Meetup.com and many other websites. Share your views and ideas on these forums and then join other people who are willing to help you in reaching your goals. This will make the process of any routine a fun and you will look forward to it every time and one day it will automatically be the deeply instilled habit.
Having a support also tends to release stress as there is a natural motivation around which can push you to break your comfort zones and be at your best. Hang out with people who drive you and motivate you to next level of performance in your life. You will become more confident, empowered and stress-free !!

Live Stress-Free & Joyfully,

Deadline Anxiety and Stress?

Who is devoid of stress related to the Professional Deadlines? Be it a high profile Executive in a Multinational Conglomerate or an Operation Manager at a small organization, the pressure of getting things done in a strict timeline and with accuracy is a normal expectation.
As we are currently operating in the era of high tech systems and gadgets, human’s are perceived to be responding and making things happen faster than ever before. This has certainly added a lot of Anxiety and Stress in our lives.
If you are running your own business or working as a Sales Professional or even an 9-5 office job, you can’t escape the pressure of DEADLINES.

Now, the question is How to manage the anxiousness and anticipations that comes along with ‘Deadline Pressure’ of achieving the target or delivering the project or anything involving your business specifically.

In a study done by Anxiety and Depression Association of America (https://adaa.org/workplace-stress-anxiety-disorders-survey)

The main culprits of work-related stress:

  •  deadlines (55 percent)
  • interpersonal relationships (53 percent)
  • staff management (50 percent)
  • dealing with issues/problems that arise (49 percent)

The top on the list is Deadline Pressure. It’s clearly impacting the our mental health, physical well-being and also our relationships with our family and friends.
So, Let me share these 3 Key Strategies which can reduce your Work Stress and Deadline Anxiety and can help you feeling stress-free and empowered.

 

1. Start to Work Backward from your End Goal

The idea is to not get overwhelmed with a huge target or a deadline. Infact, break it down in smaller action items based on your required end result. When you have smaller little goals rather than a big fat task or a huge project, you mind will not be overwhelmed and can easily accomplish the task in hand with greater efficiency.
In an article printed by Workshifting Team, It mentioned about importance of S.M.A.R.T Goal Setting which basically means create goals at the beginning that are S.M.A.R.T.- specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely. ((http://www.workshifting.com/2012/03/how-to-overcome-the-anxiety-of-an-upcoming-deadline.html)
Additionally the article highlighted on maintaining the list of specific goals, their completion time and then be able to mark off each and every part of the project as you progress, knowing with certainty that you are going to finish on time.

 

2. Unwind Every Day

I can’t emphasize enough on the importance of Daily Unwinding which is most important habit for you to instill if you want a stress-free, mentally and physically healthy life.
Unwinding detaches us from the pressures of your work life and it basically rejuvenates you, recharges your cognitive fuel, enhances your focus and increases your performance. This all happens as you give your brain some rest from the recurring thoughts of pressure and deadlines to meet.

Unwinding can be playing your favourite sports, hitting the gym, going for a walk, spending time with your family or anything that takes off your mind from usual work thoughts. Once you do activities that you really enjoy, your brain secretes dopamine and serotonin which are happy hormones which reduces anxiety and helps in making you feel more energetic and confident. The more focus, high energy and positive outlook you possess, the more it will reflect in your work performance and productivity

 

3. Practice Law of Attraction

World famous Life Coach, Tony Robbins has said “ Success is 80 percent your psychology and 20 percent strategy”.

Along the lines of making your plan of action to reach your target or meeting your deadlines, you need to keep the positive mindset, since each and every thought contains underlying energy dissipated to the Universe.

If you are continuously worried about the timelines and freaking out about the stuff that needs to be completed, you will end up emitting negative energy to the Universe and that will come back to you in form of negative result or negative emotion such as anger, feeling sadness and anxiousness.

The more you are aware of your thoughts and try to look at every challenge as an opportunity to expand, to learn and to evolve, the better chances will be there to achieve your targets and deliver the projects on deadlines. It’s simply because what we desire comes to us only when we ask for it in a positive manner and then remain hopeful and positive along the way.

As per Wikipedia Law of attraction:  “is the New Thought philosophy, the law of attraction is the belief that by focusing on positive or negative thoughts a person brings positive or negative experiences into their life.[1][2] The belief is based on the idea that people and their thoughts are both made from “pure energy”, and that through the process of “like energy attracts like energy” a person can improve their own health, wealth and personal relationships”

Law of attraction is single big resource we all have access to implement, without any limitation. So, use it to your benefit and make your desired life a reality.

How to not Stress on other’s JUDGEMENTS?

Sometimes, We experience Stress in our lives when we are pulled to participate in events, situations or activities we personally don’t enjoy or align positively with. But, we tend to do all of that so we are not judged by others as ‘careless’’ ‘snob’ or ‘boring’. The point is even if you move along and try to do the things that others think that should do, you end up adding up stress as you are uncomfortable or simply put, that’s not your thing!!

Alternatively, If you do say NO to something you don’t want to indulge in, then also you worry or get stressed out about how the other person might be feeling about you. It’s like both ways you tend to get stressed out.

Personally, I am not anti social but I am very choosy about people I hang out with. In the past, I have been called as ‘Boring’ as I just didn’t want to join a group of people for whom partying means boozing every friday night. Now, that’s not my thing. But, being labeled as boring by some set of people really didn’t interfere with my Self Esteem as over period of time i have learnt to be self aware and self accepting.

But the question is, why are we really adding up stress in our lives? Why are we not able to say NO to what we don’t like to be involved in? Why are we afraid of being judged? Why is someone’s opinion about us matters so much?

 

The answer to that is.. We are not Self Empowered !

Self Empowerment is the only stage where in a person has highest self acceptance and self esteem. He/She exactly knows what his values, visions and beliefs are and he lives it on daily basis. And anything that is deviating him from his life goals isn’t his thing.

And Yeah!! That’s powerful.

When you know how you want to lead your life and you know what exactly you want — you make choices. You have to. Your choices will define your life.

So, if you want to make clear choices, you need to first of all know yourself fully!! Be completely aware of your mindset and accept who you are in totality.

Now, don’t think that if you are thinking about yourself or making choices, it’s actually like neglecting others and being selfish. Most of the people think that Self love is selfish. In reality, if you are empowered, you have much more energy and love to share with everyone around you. As you can only give out what you have.

 “If you have love and strength inside of you only then you will pass it to others” So, today make a choice.

Make a choice to get on the journey of your Self Empowerment. Make perfect choices based on your desires, your visions and your life goals. You will get respected everywhere eventually. Even if you are not a perfect person on someone’s radar, it doesn’t mean you are not.

You are a unique being with your own qualities and uniqueness and you are here to live and experience that.

Other’s opinion is just reflection of their perceptions.. It’s nothing to do with you. So stop Stressing and Start Living fully- Your Empowered Self

 “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
– C.G. Jung

 

Committed to your life goals?

“You always have two choices, Your Commitment VS Your Fear” Sammy Davis Jr.

Well, i thought about writing about the Power of Commitment, the ability to focus on one task and complete it no matter what VS exhibiting a great IQ with no strong commitment backing it. We have about a million thoughts on what we want to do in our life, then we filter it along the journey and choose a few that makes sense to us based on the circumstances and resources available. A majority of people are not able to find out one absolute thing they want to do and commit to it with their heart and soul, which is the major reason for failure.

Few Steps, I have laid down below to enable you figuring out what matters to you and then committing yourself to achieve it with the utmost dedication and faith. Clarity and Focus will allow the “Source Energy” to manifest it for you.

Sometimes, you gotta be so innocently determined, where there is no fluctuation of thoughts, no assumptions, no expectations but just simply a bull’s eye to hit. I happened to see the movie “Forrest Gump” which was released in 1994 (Winner of Best Movie, Academy Awards) starring Tom Hanks as Forrest Gump, who is physically and intellectually challenged during his childhood but grows up as an Honorary Army Medalist, a Ping Pong champion who is awarded by The President of the US, A Shrimp Boat Captain and finally creating a fat ass Multi Million Dollar empire as Bubba Gump Shrimp.

Forrest Gump did fall in the trap of being judged and bullied badly in the very beginning of his life by other school kids and teachers but, he cared less about the whole bullying and learned to accept life the way it is. Instead, he became more focused and innocently committed on what he was going to work on without being bothered by the results. The best part was that he himself never judged anyone and accepted everything as the way it was. He was an intense lover, a trustworthy friend, courageous, witty and unbiased.

This character was an Oscar Winner for what it expressed about living a great life and achieving success despite of where you are now. Each of us has an award-winning character inside of us who is willing to expand, stretch himself and walk miles and miles towards the destiny we are bound to create.

Let’s talk about few important steps that I believe help you reaching your goals.

1. Have a Real Strong Purpose

Deciding what you truly want without being afraid or judged is the first step to touch your higher self and then, working relentlessly for it, will make you the creator of your destiny. Make an unshakable faith “your companion in the process”. Having a strong purpose detangles you from outside distractions and noises, and let you focus on what you really need to do.

2. Stay Utterly Focused

One focused desire, one focused goal at a time. Choose it and then work on it. Forget the rest. Forget about expected results. Just commit. Commit as your life is dependent on it. Make a point to reinforce your focus every day by doing mindful activities such as meditation, affirmations and visualization. These techniques provide clarity of mind which helps you remaining more and more focused.

3. Don’t give a DAMN about anyone’s opinion about YOU

You and only YOU define yourself.

We all have people around us who want to keep us protected and stop us from taking risks like changing careers, following our passions or not simply not believing in our wild and big dreams. You have to keep all that advice and suggestions on the side and simply focus on your dream goals. You really don’t have to get affected if someone who doesn’t believe in your dreams as they are simply using their own perception of life and the things they can do in it.

What matters the most is that you don’t get offended by anyone’s judgment and opinion about you. You will discover your own self in the process of life by your own experiences and once you do find yourself, you will be amazed at the confidence you will radiate.

4. Express Yourself Your Way!

We are so uniquely built with different colors, bodies, mindsets, life choices, habits and talents. Each of us are like the different colors in the rainbow with it’s own identity yet so intermingled. When we express ourselves fully in the world full of multiple other expressions, we are creating a space of uniqueness. That makes us feel we are adding value, making a difference and being useful to the world in our own way.

Be it music, dance, science, storytelling, sports or sculpturing, anything, that is your thing, just express it. There is enough space for everyone to make a difference. Self Expression is most important in unleashing the Power Attitude that you already possess, which allows you to create Power Success.

Conclusion: Whatever you do, Commit with pure heart and emotion. You are bound to get what you want. The winner inside you is waiting to be awarded with all the gifts of life that you strive for.

 

SELF AWARENESS ?

Don’t you think that these days people are pretty much running on auto-pilot where there is no self control? It’s like our reactions and responses are based on external stimulus and usually they are pretty quick and not thoughtful.

Let’s say, If someone wants to make you angry, it takes them less than a minute to do so and similarly someone just needs few minutes to butter you up and please you. Why is that the case? Why is human so focused on others opinions or external circumstances?

And, do you think this all causes stress in our life. Well, yes, hundred percent. Let me explain you how. 

It’s clear that when we are simply reacting to others opinion we believe what they think of us is completely true rather than having our own self awareness about ourselves which basically includes our values, visions, virtues and feelings. So, when we are not clear about ourselves and haven’t dig deeper inside of us, there is always a chance of getting hurt by external negativity or criticism which causes stress, low self confidence and low level of success in life.

Self Awareness is first stage of Self Empowerment which is the ultimate state of living an extremely powerful, impactful, happy, healthy and fulfilling life. By knowing yourself, you will have a clarity in your choices. For example, someone wants you to be little dishonest in a business deal which can create much financial gain. Now this is pretty lucrative situation where you are lured and stressed at both time as you now have to make a choice.

So, if you are clear about your value of, let’s say honestly, you will take no time in making a bold choice and stick to it and get out of unnecessary stress.

In our life, we encounter many situations where having clarity on our feelings, emotions and desires help us take appropriate decisions in our life. If these decisions are in alignment with your core self, you will always be more confident and anxiety free. But similarly, if you are just moving with the flow with no clear sense of direction, it’s very much going to cause you stress, anxiety, guilt and low morale feelings.

In order for you to become self aware, first thing is to pay attention to your deeper self.

  • Figure out what type of work makes you most happy and fulfilled as that would be sort of your purpose in life. That might not be a current part of your life but it’s still in your desire list.
  • Find your core values which is basically set of virtues that you totally believe in and it reflects in your actions in our everyday life. For example, honesty, compassion, integrity, forgiveness and so on.
  • Write down your top 5 values and pay attention on how much you live up to them and how much you contradict with them while making decisions.
  • Be aware of your own thoughts and feelings while being involved in activities, relationships, business dealings and while being with your own self and note down what triggers what type of feelings.

Self Awareness comes along in your life with the help of certain practices which makes you more conscious of your behaviour and feelings. Some of them are:

  1. Meditation
  2. Journaling
  3. Sharing your thoughts with trustworthy and like minded friends
  4. Joining a certain group of Mindful beings and have discussions on regular basis
  5. Hiring a Coach

Getting on the path self mastery and empowerment starts by knowing the self. Once you open the doors to your inner world, you begin to get on the journey on creating a very positive, happy, stress free and successful life for yourself !

 

3 Mistakes that are stopping you from Creating Your Best Life !

Are you settling for a life that is average? Does your life gives you enough of a high to enjoy each day as if you were unwrapping wonderful gifts and beautiful surprises? If you are not there yet, then let me tell you, you are settling for less than what you deserve.

Every Human intrinsically has the capability to get there and see their life as a totally amazing, high quality, exuberant and miraculous masterpiece. I get it. It’s not easy to really get to that level of life, but the good thing is, it’s not even that difficult. I myself had been living a mediocre life for several years before I got my breakthrough and self realization of what I am capable of and what my mission in life is about. As I realized my true value and impact and sense of contribution I could make into the world, I started to unleash my true powers and designed my Powerpack life. Everyone has that power in them, but sadly it’s hidden and sometimes even buried under the pile of life pressures, social norms, wrong beliefs and self limiting attitudes.

“Only you can take inner freedom away from yourself, or give it to yourself. Nobody else can.”  
— Michael A. Singer, The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself

Today, I am inspired to talk about the list of 3 mistakes people do that let them live a mediocre, below average and a sulking life.  If you are really an honest and open minded fellow, you will probably get some breakthroughs which can help you in redesigning your future and make you more powerful. Let’s talk about them now.

1. Giving Away “The Self Control” to Others

One of the most commonly seen behaviour pattern in all aspects of our life, be it our professional or personal associations is Low or No Self Control to outward stimulus. Many People tend to lose their self control and get carried away when someone pushes their buttons or does something that they don’t assume is appropriate or fair to them. Then they start to react based on other person’s actions in order to balance out the equation.

This is where people lose their power and let the negative emotions overpower them and tend to deviate them from their major goals and productive outcomes. When people behave or react exactly the way the other person wants, it seems like the control of their life is in other’s hands and with one pulling of the strings, they start to behave like puppets.

Dr. J. Richard Cookerly, Loveologist, in his famous blog, Healthy Self-Love and Not Giving Your Power Away has pointed out – “Those who learn how ‘not to give their power away’ to others or to old, destructive training tend to live more powerfully, enjoyably, effectively and peacefully. They also live more self-directed, healthful lives, and likely are able to do more good for others”

The repercussions of losing your control over situation and acting outrageously makes us uneasy and stressed due to inflow of emotions such as resentment, guilt, pain, insult, feeling small and low self esteem. It is proven when we remain untouched by some other outside stimulus, we create a stable mind and strong character which aids in succeeding in all facets of our life. You can literally win over everyone you encounter and experience boundless power and peace inside your heart.

So, today, ask yourself.

  • Am I giving away my powers to other to control my decisions, behaviors or life choices? If yes, then ask Why?
  • Is this making me feel less about myself?
  • What can I change to start feeling more strong and peaceful?
  • Am I going to allow others to hijack my brain forever?

You might get some quick answers and if you will pay more attention and further self introspect and take actions, you will slowly tend to train your brain to react in a way you want it to.

2. Wrong thinking about “Money and Abundance”

How many of you think that excess money is bad for a morally sound and ethical life? Or that more money or materialistic pleasure destroy the relationships? It’s so important to think deeply about these questions as they might be the reason that you actually never could achieve financial abundance.

It’s normal to look at a rich fellow and assume that he was born lucky, or has made excess money by gimmicking people in his business, or he is just extremely smart and has some secret weapon to invade the land of treasures. But, if we really look beyond then we see some special traits that play a major role in his massive success and abundance.

Tony Robbins in his awesome article, Are you Free from Finacial Fear (Link : https://www.tonyrobbins.com/wealth-lifestyle/emotional-fitness-around-money/) has said “YOUR UNCONSCIOUS BELIEFS ABOUT MONEY ARE KEEPING YOU FROM THE LIFE YOU REALLY WANT” which clearly emphasize on the importance of deeper beliefs you have around money.

  • Do you believe that world is a scarce place and people have to work hard to survive?
  • Have you linked more money with a prudent, arrogant and unethical life?
  • Do you think all the people with more money usually don’t care for people who are not that fortunate?
  • Have you tried to expand your skillset to make yourself more valuable so you can step higher in the ladder?
  • Do you occasionally get to go on the wrong side with people regarding money?

3. Giving in to your “FEARS”

Fear is the biggest enemy of creativity! It really is.

It holds us back from getting exposed to big and unseen marvelous things which could be a part of your life. Everyone I have ever met has some dreams and imaginations, be it opening up their own unique business, coming out of a negative relationships, travelling world to experience various cultures and ways of life, leaving their current job and finding their dream career, quitting smoking or simply changing their eating habits to have healthy lifestyle. Good thing i we all know we need to do something to change the state of our lives, so our spirit directs us to those imaginations and ideas but, the bad thing is we never take actions.

Now, What is the reason of procrastination? Is it that we really don’t want better lives? Is it we really want to sulk all of our lives and never do what our heart and mind cries for? No, we don’t want to sulk or stay in negativity. Each of us want to get our breakthroughs and a big and powerful life but what hold us back from taking action is FEAR OF UNKNOWN. It’s the fear of uncertainty that hold us back.

Human brain doesn’t like Uncertainty

David Rock, CEO NeuroLeadership Group in his article “A Hunger for Certainty” (https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-brain-work/200910/hunger-certainty) mentions “A sense of uncertainty about the future generates a strong threat or ‘alert’ response in your limbic system. Your brain detects something is wrong, and your ability to focus on other issues diminishes. Your brain doesn’t like uncertainty – it’s like a type of pain, something to be avoided. Certainty on the other hand feels rewarding, and we tend to steer toward it, even when it might be better for us to remain uncertain” ..

Since, Now we now know that fear controls our actions to move forward. But, you don’t have to be the slave of your brain’s projections about the outcomes and get confused (based on the previous experiences and memories stored) rather you can really influence your brain by the “power of your mind”. Your mind can influence your brain by using its mindful powers through self affirmations and mindful meditations. You can really train your brain to work for you and your wishes without being afraid of unknown results.

Imagine when we started to walk first, if we would have never taken the first step being afraid of uncertain fall, we would have never been running today. It happened as you allowed to let the excitement of walk and being able to reach at different places overpower the fear of fall. At that time, we had faith in life, more excitement and no fear and ironically, as we grow up, we have more negative beliefs, less faith in process of life and much more FEAR.

Today, allow your mind to overcome your brain’s barriers. Follow your heart’s excitement and give yourself an opportunity to break up the shackles of fear and take decisions that you think are important for scaling up your life. Don’t worry on the Outcomes. In the end, A powerful mind will surely lead to a Powerful life.

Stress Culprit..

Since I have been working with many clients for their increased stress levels in their life, I have discovered a strong relation between our mindset, attitude and habits with the accumulation of stress.

I strongly feel I should share my research outcomes with you which can help you making a shift in your life as well.

Today, we live in a materialistic world where self worth is often quantified by material accumulations, performance and powerful positions. Additionally, the current lifestyle of dependence on technology has moved everything at a faster pace than ever, which has forced undue expectations on people. There is false sense of urgency in the environment which is driving people to more stress and low productivity. Low performance in different aspects of life in turns increase stressful feelings which can create multiple psychological and physical health issues in people such as blood pressure, heart stroke, diabetes, anxiety and depression.

BUT, NOT ALL STRESS IS BAD

Stress can be helpful at times to prepare for a challenging situations such as a job interview, stage performance or an important exam. It can even protect you from danger by preparing our body to face a threat or flee to safety. As there is shooting up of adrenaline in the body, your pulse quickens, you breathe faster, your muscles tense, your brain uses more oxygen and increases activity—all functions aimed at survival.

Let’s look at our lives with a new perspective and figure out how much stress is Self-Inflicted stress.

1. Wrong Self Identifications

When you ask someone about their introduction, he would say “I am John and I am a Lawyer”. This sentence has a problem as it is letting John, subconsciously start to identify himself as Lawyer first and other things later. See, every moment of your life, your mind is your treasure and it is only thing that can make you happy and peaceful or get you a nervous breakdown.

When you start to identify yourself as doctors, engineers, lawyers, carpenters or any other titles, you basically embrace it so deeply that you really don’t know where to disengage. This all happens at the subconscious level as your subconscious mind observes and stores the information but unlike conscious mind, it really can’t do the reasoning.

When you start to look yourself as a human being who is more than a CEO, an entrepreneur or a salesman, you start to create a space for unwinding from that role and to get into another role which is less serious, more playful and your natural self. The simple understanding of the truth that we are not our titles or labels, but are only playing those roles to create the professional and financial life we desire. When you learn to disengage and come back to your “human self”, you tend you create much more meaningful moments for yourself and others around you which obviously makes you more happy.

2. Being Over Competitive

We have grown up with belief system of being able to excel among others and prove our capability. To some extent, it has helped some people to grow their status, positions or ranking in their life but mostly it has added stress. Now, when we are competing with each other, we are treating life as a race, where as it’s a very individual journey of our own set of experiences. Everyone has his or her own life story and circumstances which makes them take certain decisions related to their life and career choices.

You might want to outperform in your sales quota this month or you want to be the best cook in the world, is all possible but with it’s own unique style. You can’t sell better than others if you don’t have unique style of selling and you can’t be the best chef without your own flavor of cooking.

Anything that you desire to be best at is only happening when you unleash your hidden talent and relentlessly work towards improving yourself rather than competing with the world. This helps in creating a self image which is internally driven and stable. Your competition is with yourself which makes you less worrisome and more productive.

3. Imbalance in personal and professional life

So most of the time, your wife, children or other family members usually eat evening dinner by themselves since they know you are not going to make it and they have pretty much adjusted with your being absent and they are also kind used of your leaving the most important decisions regarding your children or house stuff to the spouse or others. Is this resonating with your current life situation? if yes, then it clearly depicts an imbalance in your personal and professional life.

We all have ambitions and we are willing to stretch ourselves to make our dream a reality but if you are missing most of the cherished moments with your loved ones, then it’s like building a dream world in which only you would reside.

Creating a healthy balance between your professional and personal expectations is really important. Before dying, the Apple CEO, Steve  Jobs spent his final days surrounded by close family members, and used his last interview to explain to his wife and children why he “wasn’t always there for them,” Now, imagine the man who created this huge empire of Apple products and changed the way we communicate entirely, was only concerned about what his children think of him and he wanted to explain to them about his absence and the reasons behind it.

Good thing is you don’t have to reach such a stage to realize the importance of your loved ones. As you manage personal engagements more efficiently, you create much stronger bonds with your spouse, your children and close friends, which gives you a sense of security, happiness and a space to share deep love. You gain more respect inside your home and outside in the professional world, which makes your self esteem rise up. Additionally, this helps you UNWINDING from your professional roles and makes you life much stress free and joyful.

4.  Time Management

Are you feeling overwhelmed by tons of activities in a to-do list and you don’t really know  how to accomplish them as they keep on growing every two hours? It’s a situation many people go through on a daily basis and it seems too stressful to handle at times.

The reason to this is the clarity on importance of activities and not assigning timelines to complete these activities. You can avoid these self-inflicted stressors by just being more proactive and utilizing the power of organizing things in order of priority.

After prioritization, you need to set up a certain timeline for the result and make sure you complete the task before leaving it in between. Don’t look for easier tasks to be done first but in fact chose the one which will give you optimal results and will move you ahead towards your goal.

There is a great deal of science behind the chemistry of the brain and the completion of tasks, which tells us that the brain releases endorphins (feel good hormones) as it registers the accomplishment made by you, which makes you more energetic and happy. A happy mind will bring more abundance in your life by accomplishing even more and more and obviously which will make it more powerful and efficient.

5. Are you in love with what you do? Are you feeling fulfilled?

I personally struggled with this question for almost a decade in my life,  until i was serious about getting to know the real truth. I was doing well at my 9-5 corporate job but deep inside I never felt fulfilled.

You might have heard many times about having passion for your work or creating a dream career where the love for the work keeps you going on and on tirelessly. This is truly possible when you give your imaginations, your ideas and your vision a chance to manifest.

Unless, you really do what you heart desires, you can’t be truly happy and would live a stressful professional life as your energy is not a hundred percent towards your work and everything extra seems like an added pressure on your shoulder. Since, you can’t feel it in your heart, you can’t visualize your destiny which leads to unfullment.

Sometimes, you have to leave fears and ask yourself  “Is this really the work/job/career I want to be associated with?” “Is this the deep calling of my life where i can make my impact in the world?” “Is this really what i want to be remembered for?” If the answer to these questions is NO, then do yourself a favor and start to follow your heart and give yourself a chance as you deserve to be exploding the potential that you are born with. It might seem difficult to make shift in your current career due to financial dependence, but it’s not impossible. “WHERE THERE IS A WILL, THERE IS A WAY”

Conclusion: Our mindset and attitude are crucial elements for a healthy, stable and

stress free

life. The more open we are to learn new beliefs and leave the usual old ordinary ones behind, the more we become in tune with the Universe’s energy. Stress is a waste of that same divine energy which is thriving inside of us and which guides us for an uplifted powerful life. If you will introspect on the

above said

points, you will surely get some insights about your inner world and will figure out the next steps you need to take.

 

7 Ways to Kick Anxiety Out

Anxiety has been a part of our lives forever as it has been used for ages to help us protect from the dangers. Our brain has been designed over millions of years to help us survive and defend against the threat. It’s actually a great capability of the rain, without it most of us wouldn’t be even be getting outside of our homes, walking on pathways, driving, conducting business or doing anything for that matter. But we don’t need that level of triggering of brain chemicals which we needed hundreds of years ago to protect yourself and families from dangerous wild animals or to hunt for a living.

In today’s world, we don’t have to deal with similar threats but still, anxiety is overpowering our life. The adrenaline rush, clinching in stomach, dizziness and nausea are common symptoms we all go through before we have some fearful or undesirable situation to face.

If Anxiety is troubling you once in awhile, it’s ok but if it’s overtaking your life and making you miserable then certainly it needs to be fixed. But how? How can we fix something which seems to be an automatic response? These were exactly my questions when i first started to experience anxiety.

There are some common psychological patterns that we all follow which makes us feel good or bad. I am not condemning some serious chemical disturbances which leads to an anxiety disorder or acute anxiety situations. Since, i myself have been suffering from it, i do know it’s no joke. It really is very frustrating and can lead to depression. Medical help is needed in severe cases but that is not the solution. Our thinking patterns, extreme stress, overly competitiveness, low self-esteem, guilt, emotional abuse are some of many reasons of acute anxiety.

I figured out major breakthrough points if focused or implemented can help a lot with your anxiety.

 1. Don’t Run Away from It!

Anxiety is never going to kill you. It’s not a deadly disease so first of all don’t look at this as one. The more you get afraid of having anxiety or panic attack the more your brain will trigger it again. So, when the episode comes, just focus on your breath and become mindful of your being alive. As long as you are breathing, you are not going to die even though it appears scary like hell with heart palpitations and dizziness. You simply “Welcome Anxiety”. let it work on your body but you just focus on your breath. When you know you are alive and nothing can kill you, you are giving signals to your brain of being “Fearless” which means brain doesn’t find it relevant to continue sending anxiety signals to you and eventually anxiety fades away.

Remember, the brain is not your enemy, it’s your friend, you just need to know the ways to make it work for you. Brain simply passes on anxiety or panic signals by taking commands from your subconscious mind to protect you. So you can exactly reverse the process through the conscious mind.

2. Look for the Reasons.

Why is it happening even at first place? What is triggering that? Am I doing something wrong? What am I so afraid of? Ask , Ask and Ask.

When you will ask, you will get answers. Self Introspection is majorly important if you are suffering from regular anxiety. I figured out from my own introspection that I suffer anxiety due to high expectations from myself in majorly every department of  my life. Also adding up was my loneliness after the failed marriage and facing tougher and stressful situations`in a new country.

Highly driven people also usually attract anxiety and depression as they don’t want to left behind others in the competitive world. So, What are your reasons? Find them out. For self awareness, one needs to be real to “The Self”. No fear of judgements. Be detached and see yourself as a being who is not flawless. Once you figure out what makes you fearful or desperate, you will know how to replace that with better positive and healing thoughts.

3. Start to Live in “The Present”

 

All we really have in this life time truly is the moments. So far we have lived millions of moments, some of them full of joys and some with sorrows. But they are already gone and what greets you is “a new moment” right now right here. Each and every moment is inevitable. If we pay attention to the inevitability of each moment, we will be living it fully rather clinging to the pains of the past experiences. What keeps on letting living on fear is our past experiences or future expectations. We are really never living this moment with utmost pleasure as we are either living in past memories or future dreams and we miss the most of the present.

4. Be in-tune with Universe

Everything is this Universe happening for us and not against us. Trusting the fact that life brings a series of challenges for us to grow mentally, emotionally and logically along the journey of our lives. We are interlinked deeply with Universe and sometimes moving with the flow is the best for our mental health as it opens us to the new experiences and dimensions of our own hidden personality.

How would we learn to care, share and be compassionate to others if we ourself don’t suffer? When we let the Universe play it’s role and we remain in tune with it, we easily let go of the resistance to change and cause less pain to ourselves. Letting go of heavy emotions such as anger, frustration and guilt reduces anxiety and depression and lead to a more joyful life.

5. Practice Yoga & Breathing Exercises

What connects us to our being is nothing but “our breath”. Learning how to use our breaths to relax our minds is the most important as it can create wonderful deeper inner experiences. Yoga, which basically means union, is a practice that allows to create a space where you combine your body, mind and spirit with your breaths. It produces profound relaxation by increasing oxygen to your brain and all muscles which in turns helps you to relax deeper. I simply can’t live without it anymore after experiencing the numerous benefits on my overall health.

I can’t describe enough in words the benefits of deep breathing exercises. Inhaling deeply and exhaling slowly can calm down the noises in brain and uneasiness in your gut in a few seconds only. It’s amazing to know that our breaths are the controlling mechanisms to our minds. We can deviate from a turbulent and panic induced thought or expression of anger by simply putting the focus on our breath. There are various Indian yogic techniques in like Pranayam, Anulom-Vilom and Kapal Bhati which are very powerful and totally healing.

6. Unwind More and More.. Specially before you go to bed

Our subconscious mind is always operational, even while we are asleep and it works on tons of memories, good or bad feelings we have experienced in the past, our fears and aspirations and other visual information. Once we are sleeping our subconscious mind takes control and gives us its impression in terms of quality of sleep, dreams we see and how we feel after we get up. I had most of my panic attacks while i was in the middle of sleep and woke me up with a jolt. Most of us can check on the health of our subconscious mind by evaluating how deeply we sleep and the kind of dreams we experience.

Feeding our conscious or active mind with positive and healing thoughts consistently helps a lot in channelizing our subconscious mind towards calmness, love, peace and safety. Unwinding your pressures and day to day stress especially before going bed is extremely helpful.

Think and write about any negative feelings you experienced and then start to focus on your top three wins for the day, things that you are thankful for and set up your goals for the next day. While we all go through negative feelings since we are humans, but the good thing is if we train our conscious mind to start focusing more on smaller wins, little pleasures and optimism, it in turn trains our subconscious to work in accordance and make us more happy, stable, full of positive energy and very productive.

7. Guided Meditation- Guide your Mind to Ease

A man’s mind is stretched by a new idea or sensation, and never shrinks back to its former dimensions.”
— Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr., Autocrat of the Breakfast Table

Our minds can’t stop working. All we can do with them is to channelize them effectively so it works for us and not against us. We have heard about the benefits of meditation on our mental health and it’s effect on the brain chemistry. After studying some of Buddhist monks brains’, scientists were able to prove the structural changes in the brain due to the continuous practice of meditation.

These changes affect their response to stressful events, a sense of calmness and level of concentration. Most of us have tried self meditation but couldn’t derive the effective results. To my personal experience, guided meditation is a great way to start and it’s an effective way to guide your mind on what it should focus on.

There are numerous resources available as DVDs or on Youtube that could be a great support in your journey towards being a meditator. After practicing it for some time, you will see an automatic change in your brain conditioning and you will be able to relax yourself more and more anywhere anytime.

 

Some of the resources I use are available on Youtube. You can check further more links and choose what works for you.

https://youtu.be/6vO1wPAmiMQ

https://youtu.be/hvOgpzRJxJg

Conclusion

Knowing what generates a good mental health and what harms it is the first thing to work on while dealing with the monster of anxiety. It’s really not any illness but a signal that is depicts our inner lives and thinking patterns.. A healthy mind is a source of abundance, high productivity and joyful experiences. We have to remember this one fact that our brain is subordinate of our mind and we can change the functioning of our brain by changing our mind’s energy and direction.

Life is a journey, not a destination. So don’t be hard on yourself. Breathe Deep, Play a little, Joke on yourself and simply pay attention and enjoy the miracles that unfold every day in front of us.