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8 Wonder Traits of Emotional Resilient People
Life isn't a bed of roses. What works here is emotional resilience, a way to combat outside odds with complete inner evolution and strength. Also, it isn't that people, who live a life full of happiness and peace, do not counter challenges; rather it is the edge that delineates them from the rest.
Going by the dictionary, the word “EMOTION” refers to that strong feeling that is derived from a person’s circumstances, moods, and/or relationships with other people. Resilience refers to positive emotions, which can co-occur with negative emotions simultaneously.
A research indicates that those people, who experience three times as many positive emotions to one of the negative emotions daily (i.e. the 3:1 ratio), are predicted to be more resilient and they usually have a fruitful reintegration.
Table of Contents
If You Cannot Own Your Emotions, They Will Own You Eventually!
How many of you are bogged down in life and have thought of relieving yourself in eternity just to forego the things happening around you? “Challenges” are a part and parcel of our lives. The most important aspect of our lives is to face these challenges.
If we are not able to effectively cope with these challenges, we cannot go very far in life. We meet a friend and she dislikes what we wear, we feel bitter. This is just a small instance.
Think of several such occurrences that happen throughout a day, and we are simply heaved down with our debilitating thoughts. Sometimes, the reality is completely different than what we imagine in our brain but to relate to it, one needs to be emotionally resilient.
Take Control – Be Emotionally Resilient!
An emotionally resilient person is enduring. Such a person never blames the external factors before he thinks through himself, focusing on every bit of his inner being. Finding the cause rather than focusing on the reaction is something that an emotionally strong person can only think of.
Suppose, we find our same sweet and warm besties being rude to us, what should we do? Feel bitter? Or get angry and end up in a fight? Or rather should take time to analyze the reason behind her changed behavior? Maybe the problem originated from me, and as for her, it is just a reaction. This is how an emotionally resilient person thinks. A similar situation, which is quite prevalent these days, is keeping up with the competition.
We see young beaming people resorting to the heinous act of suicide without even giving a second thought towards living a better life. Throughout the world, especially in the times of this pandemic (Covid-19), innumerable cases of self-assassination have been recorded!
The question is, isn’t there any other alternative to this? But being more resilient can prevent these happenings as it opens you to a host of new opportunities!
“The Resilient YOU” Will Be Able to Create Opportunities in the Challenging Times
8 Qualities that an emotionally resilient person portrays
Life isn’t a bed of roses. What works here is emotional resilience, a way to combat outside odds with complete inner evolution and strength. Also, it isn’t that people, who live a life full of happiness and peace, do not counter challenges; rather it is the edge that delineates them from the rest. The traits that an emotionally resilient person portrays are as follows:
Emotional Awareness – Emotional resilience starts with emotional awareness!
We are in a world where the instant reaction to a shrub of roses is to ‘stay away’. The deeper thought of carefully plucking the flower avoiding the thorns comes later. Whenever there is a difficult situation; we are more engrossed in getting tensed, losing our cool, and thereby reacting adversely, and this leads to deadly consequences.
Instead, if we broaden our thoughts and try to delve deep towards analyzing the situation and understand, from where the worries arise, our work will be reduced. We might find out solutions that weren’t comprehensible otherwise.
So, this time when you are in a crisis, do not raise a hue and cry. Simply, go into introspection and discover ways to combat the same through inner strength. Emotional awareness also helps one evolve and grow mentally over time.
You can understand why are you angry, sad, or even happy? Even the cause behind the emotion is reflected through awareness. An emotionally aware individual can incorporate necessary changes in his life and perform better at any front.
The very first element is to acknowledge how you are feeling and then realizing what’s causing it. It’s not always that a bad show is the end of life. A little more sensibility by accepting and acknowledging our emotions can help us rediscover ourselves and go a long way in improving the quality of life we lead.
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Perseverance – Perseverance is the key!
A trait that most winners possess! An emotionally resilient person will look into the problem that life throws at him and work towards facing it with full vigor and strength. Every little effort matters.
But the steps should be consistent. A consistent person will never face defeat is a wrong thing to say but yes, the chances of being victorious are greater. Even the defeat comes slow and can be endured.
The point is to say a resilient one is emotionally more stable and find out ways to come out of a trap rather than getting victimized under their own soiled emotions. Discipline is something that has to be practiced day in and day out. It is the norm that has to be followed for evolving as a positive personality eventually. Perseverance also leads to a broader outlook on life.
You just don’t stick to a single way of looking at things rather accept the fact that there could be several views to it. We should work on what can be done, and never leave our persistent efforts! Perseverance also nurtures patience, integrity, and other positive traits in a man, which eventually leads to refinement of personality.
People look beyond what they see and capture the opportunities hidden in every negative situation that comes forth.
Perspective – It is all about your perspective!
Before explaining the better aspect here, let us first imagine a situation that is contrary to our wistful one. We keep thinking about the problem and finally end up more miserable than required. Focusing on the issue doesn’t allow our mind to think otherwise, letting alone finding a solution.
We keep creating emotions, matching up with the negative thoughts about the adversity; which release chemical reactions in the body and they, in turn, send signals to the brain, which generate more of those undesirable thoughts to match our bodily reflexes.
So, instead of concentrating on the problem, it’s better to see the positivity in it. It’s said that every failure teaches us a lesson. Here also, think of what’s it teaching you? And how you can use the learning further in your life experiences?
An emotionally resilient person stresses upon perspective. He realizes there’s not a single way of looking at a thing. If you try to see the adversity from an observer’s point of view, you fathom ways differently and obscure a solution pretty fast.
Internal Locus of Control – Before going out, go in!
Well, being responsible for one’s actions and thereby reactions are inherent. It comes internally, completely through you. It might take years of perseverance to explore your inner energies and focus on self rather than outer possibilities.
The control is completely yours when you start diving into your being. You are strong and you are going to prevail, that’s what an emotionally resilient person thinks. Nothing can break him. Not even his negative thoughts.
He will find out a way and take every step towards achieving a solution. Shirking thoughts about society and what people would think and say, an emotionally resilient individual will concentrate all his energy into his deeper existence and will undermine all sorts of external deviating influences that are preventing him from leading a life that he wishes to live.
Every great achievement on this earth has been possible when the man has thought beyond what seems. So, the strength lies within you to integrate and follow a path of parity and toil.
Now, we have learned about the essential and distinguishing traits that an emotionally resilient person possesses. Is it possible for any of us to inculcate these characteristics and become emotionally resilient for combating life’s woes? Yes, it is! Let’s look into the practices that one should take up for nurturing emotional positivity.
Spiritual – Spiritual is perpetual!
Spiritual elevation is a practice through which one thinks beyond his body and mind. Our physical and mental faculties can be exploited only to gather experiences in life. One should understand that our mind is the storehouse of information both important and unimportant.
Breaking through the mesh of negative thought processes and evolving as a realm personality of our choice is spirituality. When we become self-responsible and understand our onus on life than embracing ‘ the internal locus’ becomes effectual.
At this juncture, we turn a bit rebellious too as we don’t allow any external person or situation to influence us and wary of disturbances. This is a major shift in thinking which revitalizes and reforms one’s life. To gain spiritualism, meditation and pranayama are common practices.
These help focus on the important aspects of life and detoxifies our soul by getting rid of trapping thoughts and ideas. The law of resonance comes into play here. You go into nothingness when you meditate and initiating from the unknown is evolution, the maturity of thoughts and actions.
Reframing – Always see the brighter side of the picture!
Looking at the brighter side of any occurrence and rendering it meaning is called reframing. It’s not about overlooking or ignoring what’s happening but it’s more oriented on the assignment of meaning. Analyzing what exactly this situation is telling me or leading me towards?
What should be done to overcome it? These are the pointers towards reframing. When we start thinking likewise, we can perceive adversities with a better and broader perspective.
In other words, reframing is like disorienting your pessimistic self into an optimistic one. In a domestic setup, if you are irked by your spouse or any other family member around, you can simply think how can this unpleasantness be turned into an opportunity? Thinking in terms of what is the challenge leading me towards? What lesson can be learnt from it?
Journaling – It is all about the world of words!
Well, journaling is the process of expressing our thoughts and emotions in words. When we write, our thoughts get constructed. We become emotionally aware and understand what’s going on within us better.
Penning down helps label our thoughts and emotions. Replacing them becomes easier as we are now aware of the cause and effect. Most problems are self-created because of overthinking. When we start writing, our disconnected pattern of fears, anxiety, anger, or anything becomes concerted and we can work upon them better.
Our brain receipts the emotions well when they are put into words. Corresponding chemical reactions occur in our system to support what we are writing. Using our hands to write rather than typing has been observed to be more effective.
In this way, both our body and mind work in tandem, and the experience is improved. Our brain thinks much faster than we realize and there are too many thoughts to comprehend. Writing channelizes our thoughts and helps relate events. For that matter consequences and solutions become self-explanatory. We react better and come out of suffocation as smoothly as we get in.
Why do you think some authors are best sellers and few are not? That’s because writing is an art, which comes to few. You can be creative and innovative towards your approach in life if your thinking is well-knitted.
Support – Even the smallest support can be the biggest help!
It’s said that if you have that one friend or guide in life, who would just listen to you out, your work, is half done. If the same benevolent person can guide you towards positivity in life then never lose him or her, because whatever you do and till the time you don’t achieve the internal locus, you need to speak to someone.
This also showcases your internal courage to approach people. Also, achieving resilience if not a one-day-task; constant perseverance, the orientation of positive thoughts, and assigning meaning takes us all the way through. During this journey, do not hesitate to seek help.
We are human beings after all and we need to converse, feel free to interact with people around us, preferably those who would understand us and not evaluate. The person can be a friend, a mentor, or a family member, or anybody.
The essence is to reach out for support when we are failing. Your well-wisher or someone who wants good for you can be a support that you can lean onto for the time being till you achieve emotional awareness and self-resilience.
Larger the Challenge, More Should Be “The Resilient You!”
If you love yourself and wish to lead a life of your choice then do become spiritually elevated first, because that is the only way you can achieve emotional resilience. A spiritually uplifted person is untouched by all the worldly happenings and you enjoy your being as much as the existence of nature, the eternal truth.
The other factors are meant to be practiced to concentrate on yourself, exposing your strengths instead of weaknesses, and broadening the outlook beyond what you can fathom. Well! Emotional resilience is certainly not something that you already have or do not have. Rather it is a skill, which you can develop with practice.
If you feel that you always tend to get entrapped into emotionally reactive phases, good news is that you hold the power to change the way you respond to the challenges thrown at you by life.